At night, the people come and go
They talk too fast, and walk too slow
Chasing time from hour to hour
I pour the drinks and crush the flowers

All over this town
Yes, a low wind may blow
And I can see through everybody
With no reason
To hide these words I feel
And no reason
To talk about the books I read
But still I do

That’s ’cause I’m a

And I wonder
Does anybody feel the way I do ?
And is evil just something you are
Or something you do ?

This once was me

I still cannot speak french: I am very lazy

Tomorrow
Will it really come?
And if it does come will I still be human?
Tomorrow
It’s surely nearer now?
You don’t think I’ll make it
I never said I wanted to!
Well did I?

So: the choice I have made
May seem strange to you
But who asked you, anyway?
It’s my life to wreck
My own way.

Young boy - I wanna help you
See these lines ? : truly disappointed

waiting again
waiting like i've waited before
waiting again
waiting here for nothing at all

and just like that the phone rings and it's my best friend calling me by mistake

so i'm waiting again
waiting like i've waited before

This is the last song I will ever sing
No: I’ve changed my mind again
Goodnight
And thank you

3.
But time is an old devil, and now it's playing its tricks on me. I finally decided to play, maybe out of being a gambler or maybe because I simply couldn't stand the feeling of the plastic chip against the palm of my hand any longer. It was making my hand sweat, wasn't it?
The roulette. Why not, a game like any other. But as soon as the chip was on the table I realized that, no, it wasn't really like the other games, where you take an active part. In the roulette you wait - that's all you do. You choose a number and then wait to find out if fate will favor you. And if there's one thing to learn from playing the roulette is that you should never, ever, let fate and time be the in charge of anything in your life. Fate and time, for God's sake, of all the things in the world! While you just stand there, helpless, uncapable of doing anything, looking at the thing go round and round. And so, time expands itself: the roulette has been spinning for ages now and it doesn't look as if it's slowing down just yet.

baudelaire once said:
Discontented with everyone and discontented with myself, I would gladly redeem myself and elate myself a little in the silence and solitude of night.
too bad i haven't slept in two days - everytime i look around dawn is coming and night is no more.
wasn't i the proud soul that said i had no regrets?

2.
A funny thing about places like this is that you can't really see the outside, I mean, you actually can lose track of time and space if you stay here long enough. I passed by the doors and I saw it was dawn - amazing, when I got here it was dark. It's hard to believe that so much time have passed while I was too busy watching the croupier's automatic moves, so fast they could almost deceive you, and the people around: it's so interesting to see their expressions, expectations and reactions.

parenthesis:

one of the best nights of my life, if not THE best.
started with a bizarre (in a good sense) day
then
good old friends
sd 3.0 (how could i not get a t-shirt?)
so many pictures
bandeira branca
vale beers
fun like the old days
ju
vini
daltinho
sergiao
faltou vanessinha for the fab 5 to be reunited
sai da frente sua squish!!!!!!!!
solta uma tartaruguinha nela!!!!
faltou chutar o filme, apesar de copos terem sido quebrados
alguem salve-nos da blondenet
WELCOME TO THE TWILIGHT ZONE, man!
up to the very end
the VERY end, eeekk!

em todo o meu passado boas e mas recordacoes
quero viver meu presente e lembrar tudo depois
nessa vida passageira eu sou eu
voce e' voce
isso e' o que mais me agrada
isso e' o que me faz dizer
que vejo flores em voce

enough quotations.
i have a story to tell:

1.

(at the Savage Garden Casino)

I'm just walking around the place. People gambling, excited faces mingled with disappointed ones in the crowd.
I play with the chip i have in my hand, why, it's just a piece of plastic, isn't it?
So why can't I let it go? I can't even put it in my pocket - I've always had this thing with pockets. Can't seem to trust them enought to put anything valuable in them. And it annoys me that when I do put something in them I have to keep on checking every now and then to see if the thing hasn't fallen out. So sweet. So weak.
The chip is making my hand sweat. Or maybe something else is.

Who cares? The important thing is that I am here because I chose to. Nobody is obliged to go to a casino, and if you choose to go to one you're a gambler - maybe you don't want to admit it, but that's the truth. Well, I'm a gambler. I've learned to love myself both for my virtues and my sins, and they're not few. Like a friend said once: I love being the devil that I am. But here I go quoting others again. And this is my story.

Arthur é um nome bem estranho para um artista louco sergipano.
E bispo, ainda. Ceus.

Quando mais nada existir que valha
A pena de viver e a dor de amar
E quando nada mais interessar
(Nem o torpor do sono que se espalha)
Quando, pelo desuso da navalha
A barba livremente caminhar
E até Deus em silêncio se afastar
Deixando-te sozinho na batalha
A arquitetar na sombra a despedida
Do mundo que te foi contraditório
Lembra-te que afinal te resta a vida
Com tudo que é insolvente e provisório
E de que ainda tens uma saída
Entrar no acaso e amar o transitório.

it's not true that life is one damn thing after another.
it's one damn thing over and over.

the red rose cries, "she is near, she is near"
and the white rose weeps, "she is late"
the larkspur listens, "i hear, i hear"
and the lily whispers, "i wait"

dearest brother in arms
our arms being our wits and our smiles
our enemies being chosen as we go
to defeat or to ignore